Don’t you hate it when you bring someone a fresh batch of homemade oatmeal-raisin cookies, and they start spitting raisins, like you just fed them a rabbit turd sammich?

That was the situation a few weeks ago, when my sister took a bite of one of those cookies and registered her displeasure. She’d expected chocolate. She wanted chocolate. And the next time I showed up, I’d better bring some chocolate.

So, as Lt. Aldo Raine of “Inglourious Basterds” might say, I obliged her with this Twix Cake.

The Ultimate Weapon of Ass Destruction.

The cake is officially called a Caramel-Chocolate Cookie-Stuffed Sour Cream Deluxe Cake, but calling this caloric abomination a “cake” is being awfully generous. It’s a candy bar delivery system filled with chopped Twix bars, a milk chocolate bar, chocolate chips and chocolate syrup.

It’s topped with melted chocolate chips.

And powdered sugar.

And let’s not forget the ribbons of dulce de leche (or caramel sundae topping) that run through it.

See what I mean?

It’s a gooey, chocolaty mess of a cake with just enough cookie crunch to keep you from snorting it.

And, it’ll put the hurt on you.

So, are you ready to tackle this monstrosity? The recipe is straightforward, having you add the mix-ins and syrups to the batter in stages so that you don’t have huge cookie clumps or big pockets of caramel in your cake. Pockets of caramel don’t sound bad until you unmold your cake from the pan, and the center collapses from caramel overload. (Should that happen, make a mental note to serve it with ice cream.)

Also, slicing this cake can be tricky. No matter what knife you use, it tends to fall apart a little, like an aging sex symbol. Don’t worry about it. The goods might get shifted around, but they’ll still be there. Generally, people are so dazzled by the sheer spectacle of this cake that they don’t notice or care what shape the slice comes in. My sister pulled it apart with her fingers, like Monkey Bread.

Twix Cake isn’t going to be part of Jamie’s Food Revolution anytime soon, nor should it be a regular part of a balanced diet, but on special occasions – birthdays, holidays or times when you need to appease a chocoholic loved one – it has its place.

Caramel-Chocolate Cookie-Stuffed Sour Cream Deluxe Cake

Adapted from Marcy Goldman’s “A Passion for Baking”

Makes 12 to 16 servings

  • 1 cup unsalted butter, softened
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 5 large eggs
  • 1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract
  • 1 cup sour cream
  • 4 cups all-purpose flour
  • 4 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 3 cups coarsely chopped Twix candy bars (6 to 8 packages)
  • 1 cup coarsely chopped milk chocolate bar
  • 1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
  • 3/4 cup dulce de leche or thick caramel sundae topping
  • 1/3 cup chocolate syrup
  • 1/2 cup melted semisweet chocolate chips
  • Confectioners’ sugar, for dusting (optional)
  1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Generously spray a 10-inch angel food cake pan with nonstick cooking spray. Place pan on a parchment paper-lined baking sheet.
  2. Using a standing mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs, vanilla and sour cream. Mix well. Fold in flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt, and blend.
  3. Fold in about one-third each of the chopped Twix, chopped chocolate bar and chocolate chips.
  4. Spoon two-thirds of batter into prepared pan, and add dollops of dulce de leche or caramel sundae topping and some chocolate syrup as you spoon in the batter. Add another one-third each of the chopped Twix, chopped chocolate bar and chocolate chips. Top with the remaining batter, and top this with remaining dulce de leche and chocolate syrup and remaining chopped Twix, chopped chocolate bar and chocolate chips.
  5. Swirl batter with a knife, making sure chunkier pieces on top are somewhat covered with batter so they bake into top surface of the cake.
  6. Bake 75 to 85 minutes, until the cake springs back when gently pressed. Cool well, and then unmold cake onto serving plate.
  7. Drizzle with melted chocolate. Chill cake 20 minutes or so, and then dust with confectioners’ sugar, if desired.