Today, hundreds of Daring Bakers are posting August’s challenge: the Chocolate Eclairs found in Chocolate Desserts by Pierre Hermé.

The challenge required making cream puff dough, pastry cream, chocolate glaze and chocolate sauce (created so seven tablespoons of sauce could be used to make the glaze); piping and baking the dough; naming a vice presidential nominee; learning the Yes Dance; and assembling the eclairs. Separately, the components aren’t difficult, but the overall process requires some coordination. Like an orgy.

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The first time I tried to make this Peach, Apricot and Cherry Pie, part of the lattice hadn’t browned. So, I popped it back into the oven, forgot to set the timer, and burned it black.

Pie requires attention.

A lot of people don’t get grits. There’s the name. Then there’s the unfortunate way some people insist on preparing them, adding too much water and dressing them like Cream of Rice. When I see someone spooning sugar onto their grits, it gives me the same sick feeling as those photos of Hulk Hogan rubbing suntan lotion onto his daughter’s thighs. Oh, the undeniable wrongness.

Here is the key to grits: dress them like a baked potato. Only stir in cream instead of sour cream. Salt and pepper? Yes. Different kinds of cheeses? Yes. Ham? Bacon? Shrimp? Oh, yes. Roasted veggies work. Fresh herbs work. Hot sauce, definitely. And all this versatility means grits are great for any meal, as an entrée or side dish. My mom makes shrimp and grits for our holiday meals. I make grits as comfort food.

Yesterday, Plumber No. 3 finally fixed the plumbing in the kitchen. The repairs required opening the basement ceiling to access the old pipes, which had been leaking some sort of sludge (surprise!), so the house smells like a body farm. But we can use the sink! We can run the dishwasher! And for these things I am truly thankful. Read More…

Last week, the kitchen sink stopped draining. The first plumber asked if I’d used Drano and then said we’d have to hire a crew to break through the brick outside and replace our pipes. We got a second opinion. The second plumber had a brain aneurysm.

In the meantime, I took the dishes outside to hose them off and wound up with a shoe full of field peas.

I loaded the dishes into two laundry baskets and a very large Rubbermaid and drove them the 45 minutes to Mom’s house, where I tapped my toes to the rhythmic whoosh of the dishwasher and talked celebrity news with my grandmother. (Once we were watching an entertainment roundup, and my mom asked, “Who’s 50 Cent?” Mommaw looks over and says, “It’s ‘Fiddy,’ Sherry. Fiddy.”)

This morning, I’m waiting for Plumber No. 3. Thankfully, this Chocolate-Banded Ice Cream Torte – didn’t require many pots, pans … or utensils. Basically, you layer ganache and store-bought ice cream in a springform pan and freeze it. I didn’t alter Dorie’s recipe much, except for making the ganache with semisweet chocolate (instead of bittersweet) and mixing strawberry ice cream in the food processor instead of raspberry. The resulting torte tastes like Neapolitan ice cream for grown-ups. A nice way to end the summer.

Not indoor plumbing-nice, but nice.

Chocolate Banded Ice Cream Torte

Adapted from Dorie Greenspan’s “Baking: From My Home to Yours”

• 1 3/4 sticks (14 tablespoons) unsalted butter, cut into pieces
• 9 ounces bittersweet chocolate, coarsely chopped
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 8 large eggs
• 1 10-ounce package frozen strawberries in syrup, thawed
• 1 quart premium-quality vanilla ice cream.
• 1 pint fresh strawberries, for decorating (optional)

1. Oil or lightly spray an 8 or 81/2 inch springform pan

2. Put the butter and chocolate in a heatproof bowl, set over a saucepan of simmering water and warm the ingredients, stirring occasionally, until they are melted. Transfer the bowl to the counter, whisk in the sugar and let the mixture cool for about 5 minutes.

3. Whisk the eggs into the chocolate mixture one at a time, whisking well after each addition. Rap the bowl against the counter to de-bubble the ganache, and pour one third of it into the springform pan. Freeze for at least 30 minutes to set the ganache. Press a piece of plastic wrap against the surface of the remaining ganache and keep it in on the counter.

4. When the first layer of ganache is set, start making the strawberry ice cream. Puree the thawed strawberries in a food processor. Spoon the ice cream into the processor, and pulse just until it is blended with the puree.

5. Spread half the ice cream over the ganache layer, return the springform to the freezer and freeze for at least 15 minutes. Scrape the remaining ice cream into a bowl, cover it with plastic and put in the freezer. Don’t wash the processor yet – you might need to soften the ice cream again.

6. When the raspberry layer is set, pour half of the remaining ganache over it. Return the pan to the freezer for another 30 minutes.

7. When it’s time to spread over the next layer of ice cream, beat the ice cream with a wooden spoon or, if it’s too frozen to soften to spreadability with the spoon, scrape it back into the processor and whir for a few seconds. Spread the last of the raspberry ice cream over the truffle layer and freeze for at least 15 minutes.

8. Finish by pouring the remaining ganache over the ice cream. Jiggle and tilt the pan to even the layer, then cover the pan with plastic wrap and freeze the torte for at least 6 hours.

9. To Finish: About 30 minutes – or up to 3 hours – before serving time, unmold the torte. The best way to do this is to warm the sides of the springform slightly with a hairdryer. Or, you can wrap a kitchen towel dampened with hot water around the pan and leave it there for 10 seconds. As soon as you remove the sides, pop the torte back into the freezer for 30 minutes, or more, so the warmed sides can re-firm.

10. If you want to decorate the top of the torte with circlets of fresh berries, do this right before serving. To soften the truffle layer just enough to hold the berries, warm the top with a quick puff of air from the hairdryer, or run a long knife under hot water, wipe it dry and pass it quickly over the top of the cake. Arrange the berries over the torte, put the torte on a platter and head for the table.

When I was a kid, one of the high points of the summer came at the end of Revival Week, when seven days of hellfire and brimstone led to one night of vanilla, strawberry and banana at the church’s annual Ice Cream Supper. Every family would bring at least one flavor, lining up canister after canister on the banquet tables pushed together in the Fellowship Hall. No infusions, no reductions, no lychees. Just homemade ice cream in exotic flavors like “peach” and “Oreo.”

With one exception.

My best friend’s dad would spend weeks planning, executing and concealing a gross-out flavor. Something that looked like vanilla but tasted like garlic or onion. Punishment for kids who fell prey to the inevitable ice cream-induced sugar high and started shoveling it in indiscriminately.

He was good. Read More…

Jeff has three grills. Once I asked him why, and the short version is that they are all different, but he loves them the same. Like children. Smoky, gassy, highly-flammable children. My interaction with them has largely consisted of admiring Jeff’s grill marks whilst handing him the Holy Meat Thermometer.

Not anymore.

When Tara from Barefoot Bloggers told me I was the group’s August Bonus Recipe Challenge winner, I knew exactly what recipe I would pick: Grilled California Pizzas. I thought it’d be the perfect opportunity to learn how to grill using something besides a.) an expensive piece of meat or b.) a hot dog. And I wanted to try the Barefoot Contessa’s pizza crust.

So, while I was waiting for the refrigerated dough to come to room temperature, it was time for the Grilling Tutorial. Jeff had already cleaned the grill, so all I had to do was pour the charcoal inside, stack the briquettes into a pyramid shape to control the heat (BABY! I LISTENED!), poured on the lighter fluid, and lit the charcoal. Then it went out, and I lit it again. And again. And one more time. And I MADE FIRE!!!

Once the coals are lit, it takes 30 to 45 minutes to heat the grill. In the meantime, you stand there with the tongs, looking cool, moving the ashy coals to the outside of the pyramid and bringing the still-black coals closer to the fire. Or, if you’re like me, you do that for about 90 seconds and then pass the mic to your husband while you run to the kitchen to prep the dough and pizza toppings.

To prep the dough, you roll and stretch each ball into an 8-inch circle and place the crusts on baking sheets sprinkled with cornmeal.

I didn’t go Contessa-crazy with the toppings. I grabbed some small prep bowls and filled them with odds-and-ends we had in the fridge – tomato slices, red pepper, yellow pepper, red onion, and basil – plus pepperoni, fresh mozzarella and grilled chicken.

Then, it was Business Time.

The pizza-grilling process moves very quickly, so you want to have everything nearby: crusts, toppings, plates, a fresh set of tongs, pastry brush and olive oil.

The trick is to slide the crusts onto the grill using the baking sheets like pizza peels. It took me two crusts to realize that. The dough looks like it would sink through the metal grid, but the heat sets it up quickly. Grill the crusts for one minute, then turn them over, brush them with olive oil, pile on the toppings, and cook them with the lid down for five minutes.

I went skimpy with the toppings on the first few pizzas, because I was afraid of weighing down the crust and making a hot mess. Trust me, PILE THEM ON. Don’t be afraid to add sauce, either. Once the dough has cooked on the grill for that first minute, the consistency is like flatbread. Load it up.

The recipe makes A LOT of dough, so you might want to scale it back or invite some people over to make their own pizzas. Coming up with different combinations is pretty addictive. While I was grilling, Jeff and I were talking about what we want to try on the pizzas the next time around: homemade pizza sauce; grilled fruit, walnuts and mascarpone; hot sausage and grilled peppers; chicken, onions and barbecue sauce; grilled veggies and goat cheese; chocolate.

And one more thing … I made the full amount of dough, because I was afraid of scorching a few crusts into oblivion, but this recipe is a beginning griller’s dream. Even when I threw two rolled-up crusts onto the grill, they cooked perfectly and tasted delicious. Ina Garten must have a deal with the devil. Or three grills for practicing.

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I’ve never been accused of being particularly domestic.

When I was in college, I moved into my first apartment with my friend Amy. One night, I saw her hurl a piece of bad fruit out the back door onto the gravel alley. A few weeks later, I burned a pan of lasagna. What do you think I did with it?

Oh, yes.

As if I thought some great claw would drop down from the sky and sift away the trash. Like our alley was a gigantic, motorized litter box.

I’ve come a long way since then. Read More…

A few months ago, Jeff ordered a new wireless controller for the PlayStation. Then the old one started working. For me, this meant we should return the new controller or sell one on eBay. For Jeff, this meant that we had a backup.

Did we really need a backup?

Friends, did America really need to declare its independence? Read More…